Saturday, January 10, 2009


* A "codependent" can be loosely defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for persons who depend on him or her. A "codependent" is one side of a relationship between mutually needy people.

* The dependent, (members of the church) or obviously needy party(s) may have emotional, physical, financial difficulties, or addictions they seemingly are unable to surmount.

* The "codependent" party, (leader) exhibits behavior which controls, makes excuses for, pities, and takes other actions to perpetuate the obviously needy party's condition, because of their desire to be needed and fear of doing anything that would change the relationship.

* A common usage of the term is that codependency occurs when enabling addiction, taking care of another person in a way that is not healthy in the long run to either that person or themselves, or both. (

("Are you encased in a world of codependency, where you have to be needed by someone who needs you to be constantly under his thumb? Does your perpetrator know how to push your buttons to get you to do what he wants? Have you ever felt like a victim simply because you do not know how to stand on your own two feet?") (

Have the churches, (leaders in the church) gotten to the point of codependency? Have we, the dependent ones given up our own freedom that God has given to us through Jesus Christ? Have we failed to keep our eyes on Christ when we are going through?

These questions and more could be asked to ascertain the condition of the churches of today.
Leaders/preachers have fostered this type of behavior by feeding of the emotion or action of its members. They feel the need to fix things that are not working like it should or like they think it should. So instead of guiding the focus of the people to God for their help, they are inadvertently causing their members to seek them for answers for their problems from Sunday to Sunday or from sermon to sermon.

The job of a minister of any type of leader in a “church” is to enlighten (edify, Eph. 4:11&12) the people through the word of God so that they themselves can see the path to Jesus and seek him for their help. In his word he states that “I am the way, the truth, and the life…” John 14:6.

The people must be lead to God and not man. This is discipleship. This is what Christ called us to do. Some of us are standing in-between people and God and God will not stand for it any longer. Humble yourselves and allow the people to see God and not you. Spare your own life in the process and those that follow you.